17 Januari 2017


in the spirit of still hesitating whether to watch la la land or not, list 12 top movies that's going on in your head right now!

1. 12 angry men (1957)
2. memento (2000)
3. lion king (1994)
4. singin' in the rain (1952) 
5. les choristes (2004) 
6. qu'est-ce qu'on a fait au bon Dieu ? (2014)
7. following (1998)
8. whiplash (2014)
9. coach carter (2005)
10. hunchback of notre dame (1996)
11. patrik, age 1.5 (2008)
12. big hero 6 (2014)

not that they are my top 12 movies, they are just.. well, the movies that pops to mind. and guess what, apparently 2014 was the best! how come i listed three movies in the exact same year while others are like, spread without any patterns. i'll just talk about those three then.

firstly: qu'est-ce qu'on a fait au bon Dieu ?

if you don't get it, that's because it's french. yes, it's a french flick. literally the title will be translated as "what have we done to you, oh dear God?" yes yes it is. it's a simple story about a french family who have four daughters. the first one married a jew. second one married a muslim. third one married a chinese. so their parents never really experience a "true" wedding they really desire as a catholic: in a church, with a priest. so now it's only the youngest. who will she be married to? this comedy is hilarious. seriously, best way you can laugh at how the diverse french act toward each other right now. many people (well, who never live in france) would judge that this movie is racist. the jokes are rude. not even funny. but honestly they're the best. and the ending? nothing compares!

yet another marriage. hm.
second of all: whiplash

all of you la la land pros must know that the director of that very movie is the same person with the one who directed whiplash. whaaaaaat? this movie is so intense. it is boring for some people who hates drama (not to say 'musical') but... i don't know. i just... i can totally relate to how the protagonist feel along the movie. not to mention the dark ending. yes, yes, it was an awesome ending.... but it's dark. there's an implication of what the protagonist has become from the beginning to the end of the movie and those emotion..... it could only be delivered by such great actors. bravo on your chemistry, miles teller and j. k. simmons. 

this scene portrays.... so many emotions. complex ones.

last one: big hero 6

favourite!!!!! one cannot not fall in love with baymax. if i could have baymax with me forever and ever, i don't think i will ever need to get married or something lol. pixar is such an ass at emotion. again, emotion ;p how can they make us fall in love with a robot? the message, the dream, even the villain. that's life, bruh. and this movie brought me to my dream of becoming an innovator. a scientist. nerdy ones hahaha. but yeah. all in all i love baymax.

hug meee... or i'll sleep.

why did i make this list? well why not? they are all good movies, trust me. the serious ones: 12 angry men (black and white, one room only, strong conversations), memento, and following (early nolan movies). the others are quite light. if you love musical, or simply music, you should try singin' in the rain (then you'll know where la la land came from) and les choristes (a light-hearted yet deep french movie). love sports? coach carter's still the best sports-themed movie i have ever watched (spoiler: the protagonists didn't win the final game). looking for something more foreign? try patrik, age 1.5, a simple-themed swedish movie which i found by accident. and you disney heads are liberated to choose between the mainstream lion king (simba was apparently my first love) or the sad crazy why-are-you-doing-this-to-quasimodo-you-stupid-writer hunchback of notre dame.


13 Januari 2017

can i please be addicted to travelling

i love travelling. no. i think i am addicted.

before going any further, let's talk about addiction, shall we? the oxford dictionary describes the core word "addict" as an enthusiastic devotee of a specified thing or activity. enthusiastic devotee. so not only that an addict is devoted, but he/she is also enthusiastic. addiction is something people normally do when they want to run from something (generally, responsibility? lol), isn't it?

how do i realize this. well let's see. i was browsing for my family's holiday here and because i found reasonably cheap-prized flights *yaay my mom asked "why don't we go to europe too?" *daangg well ok. look where the addiction came from, eh? then instead of working i spent hours. literally hours - anyway, i spent hours too, looking for cheap flights lol - to browse reasonably cheap destinations. my heart beated, my eyes were not closing, i didn't even feel hungry nor thirsty. i had those amazing feeling, like a high, even though it was only for browsing. i was like, oh that's cute! omg, this is so doable! aww ok we need to squeeze it into three days gaby, three days! etc etc.

same thing happened in edinburgh. i was only about "yeah, edinburgh, just take care of the cat, sleep, eat, watch movies, read books, i am so over travelling" and guess what. i finally explored the city and took lots of pictures. had some nice ones, too!

and now this. i am, yet again, stuck. bored. i browsed for places i could go to without visa - or at least have the "on arrival" visa regulation - found morocco, colombia, peru, chile, ecuador, even kyrsgyztan! i was like, i want this, and this, and this, and this, aaaggghhhh i need a break! and voila. the UK do not have as many bank holidays as France. well who's talkin' now.

this is what they have in kyrsgyztan! KYRS-FUCKIN-GYZTAN!!!!

now i wonder. will there be a time. like, some time else than the off time i will spend with my family, for me to just go and wander? i mean kyrsgyztan is TOTALLY a thing to put in my bucket list AND i've got a friend there (will he show me around though, hmm..). chile-peru-ecuador-colombia is definitely doable, well, after a year of dedicated spanish lesson i guess? and i can always, like always, have a weekend off to either morocco or any EU countries as i will (hopefully) get a 6-month schengen visa. if my parents are sure about going to the EU.

then came my worst regret ever. again. when i was too afraid to carry my camera to my south-eastern europe trip, spanning over slovakia-hungary-romania-bulgaria. i totally, totally regret it since everything i saw were just over my expectation. and the thrill of being a first-timer as a solo traveler? nothing compares. like, really.

castelul peles. still the best castle i have ever witnessed in my entire life. nothing compares, not even versailles, yet.

so yeah. i wanna revisit romania and bulgaria, i would reaaally love to explore bosnia and herzegovina, i NEED to realize my lithuania-latvia-estonia journey that was cancelled because of, ehm, revision -__- there are just sooo many places i would like to visit and so many things to explore.

the past 2-3 hours i spent only for looking at gmaps, browsing visa requirements, taking a sneak peak of some pages of lonely planet from different countries, all those stuff. can i please, pleaaase be addicted to travelling, please?

ps: OH! i have just remember! GEORGIA! *go back browsing oh, all the images are from google. i own nothing.

georgiaaaaaaa!!!<3 td="">

pps: after browsing georgia....... UK residents (NOT citizens) are EXEMPTED from georgian visa. WHAAAAT?! *out of breath

05 Januari 2017

gab, why don't you date/marry a bule?

erhh.. from the the intention of writing this post, i know that this whooole post would be cringy.. well, at least for me. urgh.

but why. whyyyy do i finally decide to write my answer as a post in my blog? is it some kind of propaganda or something. erh, well.

this question might sound casual to some of you guys. as casual as: hi! how are you? what's new? for some people, this question is actually a real question. and by real, i mean, they really don't get why i am not looking for a bule instead of a WNI. whatever your motivation is, as an over-thinker, i'll give you an elaborate answer.

FIRST THING FIRST. why would you separate BULE from indonesians? like, are they actually better than indonesians? like better looking, better thinking, better behaving better better better? why are you thinking like a slave? why would you think i fall in love with someone with a different race only because of his different race? like, why, people? why????

that just does not make any sense. love is love, man. even if someday, say, i would fall in love with a bule, it would be because i-love-him-for-what-he-is, not because he's a fuckin bule, duh! yet again, when you're saying bule, you would mostly mean people who are caucasian, or let's just say it, white. now i'd be harsh here: you won't refer to the yellow, the brown, and the black, guess who they are. now wait a minute. won't it just imply that you people are just a bunch of inferior racists? HA!

now SECONDLY. this will be more logical. if i were to marry a bule, i would have two choices: (1) to move out from indonesia and live with him, or (2) him to move out of his country and live with me. if i chose option (1), call me lazy but i do not want to move out of indonesia. i just don't. not that i love my country too much blah blah blah nationalism blah blah blah. nope. not yet there. i just do-not-want-to. have you ever been to a 4-season country? oh yes, you can be ultra stylish in winter and would work hard to look good in summer but, meh. i'm in love with the tropical climate just-too-much. i love having 12 hours of sun and darkness constantly, i love not having snow in my backyard (i do, i reaaally do), i love the sun and even sometimes the humidity. i am overly attached to the tropical climate indonesia has.

yet again, the reason of me going abroad and study in another country is because i am willing to go back in the first place, so the thought that i would move out of my country just because some guy........ it doesn't make any sense. and yes, without even concerning the contract i have signed to LPDP i am more than willing to go back. but worst case, if i do fell in love that much with a bule and decided to live with him, i would live in a debt of ~100,000 GBP to LPDP as i would violate the contract! i have browsed for the GDP of working classes in the UK and if i were in love with, say, someone in a managerial state, they would only have ~60,000 GBP/year, which he would only save, well, 10,000 GBP/year with all the bills and stuff. and me, i won't even know how much i'd make each year if i worked there. meaning we would live in debt for 10 years, or at least 5 the shortest. that, would be without inflation/interest/blah blah blah so basically, meh, not worth it.

ok now option (2). IF this bule was soooo in love with me and decided to move to indonesia and blah blah blah i would easily throw the question: "lo mau jadi apa?" for us indonesian, especially the educated ones, there are lotsss of options for living. you smart enough? be a professor! you like business? build a startup! oh you don't really have that much but still would like to earn a living? open a warteg in your house! you can do almost anything because you are a WNI, Warga Negara Indonesia. a bule, i.e. a WNA, they don't have that much choice. indonesia is very restricted when it comes to expats working in our country. very. restricted. they are only allowed a contract of 4 years (5 years tops if they needed a prolongation), so the only way a bule wanted to earn and MAKE a living in indonesia is by BEING indonesia. doesn't it sound like making someone convert to your religion? it is not that simple and as human, yea, we have that sense of fragile humanity. it's in our blood.

well THIRDLY. well..... erh.. when you like someone you kinda have those butterflies in your stomach, right? and when you decided that you'd like to marry someone, you'd like those butterflies to live in your stomach. forever. MWAHAHAHAHAHAH. now, simply, i just don't have those butterflies when it comes to bule. i have no romantic tendency towards someone who is not indonesian and that's just natural. maybe this has something to do with my choice of future blah blah blah, i don't know! but all i know is... love is love. you cannot force someone to like another person who you thought attractive but for me, meh. bule are just human being. they're the same. they can even more annoying than indonesians at some point but that's just because we are humans with different cultures.

but for now, i would choose indonesians over any bules in this world. no matter how hot argentinian guys are. yes. seriously. they are really, really hot, you'd melt. thanks for reading! :p


ciee judulnya ciee haha ;p

gw habis ngobrol sama salah satu teman dekat gw dan keluar lah kata" itu: "bahagia yah, hidup orang?" wkwk.

bahagia. nah lhoo, gimana deskripsiinnya hayoo.

sempat gw bahas sedikit sebenarnya ketika lagi ngomongin generasi tua (flower bloomer? gw lupa istilahnya) dan Gen-Y alias kita" jaman sekarang. kalkulasinya mudah. bahagia adalah ekspektasi dikurangi realita. what could be more simple?

dan itu kenyataan kok. biasanya manusia dengan ekspektasi rendah cenderung lebih mudah bahagia dibanding yang ekspektasinya aneh". dalam segala hal. kalau kata pebisnis sih, low risk low return. dan kenyataannya tidak sedikit yang bahagia dengan gaya hidup seperti itu.

sementara, hmmm. kebanyakan Gen-Y, lewat berbagai film/novel/ceramah/etc. inspiratif you name it, manusia" yang berani bertaruh dengan high risk high return ini makin banyak. hasilnya? well, survival of the fittest. karena sesuatu yang high return itu memang ujung"nya ga banyak di dunia.

teringat obrolan dengan kawan lain, jauh sebelum hari ini. menurutnya, kita ga boleh membiasakan diri untuk menurunkan ekspektasi, karena lama kelamaan kita akan terbiasa dengan kemudahan untuk puas. ekspektasi itu, taro lah setinggi-tingginya. biar kalau jatuh, at least mendarat dari dan ke tempat tertinggi yang kita bisa.

ok i'll quit ranting in a moment. gampangnya, buat kamu kamu yang sekarang sedang mencari bahagia tapi ga bahagia bahagia juga, coba, ukur investasi dan return yang kamu inginkan dari investasi tersebut. masuk akal kah? masih dalam jangka waktu terbaik kah? kalau memang ga masuk akal (katakan: gue sampai kapan pun ga akan masuk harvard), tinggal. it's not worth your time and commitment.

kalau masih di ambang batas toleransi (katakan: gue pengen punya body semlohay kayak beyonce), kalkulasikan. oh, jangan salah. hal itu sangat mungkin terjadi. sekarang pertanyaannya, ada waktunya? worth it spend waktu untuk punya body kayak beyonce? terus kalo punya body kayak beyonce, langkah selanjutnya apa? tetiba bikin visual album cetar membahana cem lemonade gitu? emang ada yang mau nonton/denger? kalau bisa dicapai tapi ga masuk akal dan kira" ga worth it juga, tinggal.

kalau kita terus"an ngejar sesuatu yang ga worth it, kapan mau bahagia. masak gw mesti punya body kayak beyonce dulu baru bisa bahagia, nggak kan? jadi, apa pun yang kamu pikir membuat kamu ga bahagia, coba deh analisis. apakah ekspektasi kamu berlebih? apakah in reality kamu punya waktu untuk mencapai ekspektasi itu? sesiap apa kamu gontok"an untuk sesuatu yang high risk high income?

jadi, intinya. bahagia itu ga ke mana". tapi butuh usaha. dan waktu. dan doa. waktu kita sama loh, seorang 24 jam/hari. jadi yang kamu liat bahagia itu yang mungkin selisih antara ekspektasi dan realitanya lebih rendah dari kamu. kalau dia kurang tidur, artinya dia bahagia dengan high risk high income lifestyle-nya. kalau boboknya cukup, artinya dia main di area low risk low income. udah. gitu aja kak. cup cup mwach.

21 Desember 2016

the importance of accomplishment(s) and end game(s) - part 2

so, end game. istilah ini pertama kali gw tau beberapa hari lalu, di serial yang judulnya adalah 'the blacklist.' setiap perjuangan butuh end game. selesainya kapan, bagaimana. karena kalau berjuang terus tanpa tujuan, apa pantas disebut berjuang? asigg.

sekarang gini. buat yang kemarin kemarin terlambat, akan sedikit gw jelaskan perbedaan phd dengan jenjang pendidikan lainnya. phd itu sejatinya adalah kerja, bukan kuliah. saat lo S1 dan S2, kegiatan utama lo adalah menghadiri kelas, ngerjain tugas, dan ujian. all for the sake of skill building dan pembelajaran, jadi saat seseorang masuk ke dunia kerja, otaknya udah jalan dan adjust sama kemampuan berlogika yang dibutuhkan.

gw sendiri ngerasa sebenarnya S1 dan S2 itu ga jauh beda, cuma beda beban moril dan hantaman tugasnya aja. sementara phd atau S3 itu sejatinya udah ga perlu kuliah lagi, kecuali kalau si mahasiswa ngerasa butuh support untuk hal" tertentu yang akan membantu penelitian dia. pekerjaan utama seorang mahasiswa phd ialah: ngantor. ga jauh beda kok sama kawan" 8-to-5 sejagad. kerja kira" 8 jam/hari, bedanya, kalo ga masuk ga ada pemotongan gaji hahaha ;p

phd itu lowong sekali, karena ya itu tadi, mau ngapain aja sebenarnya bebas asal target terpenuhi. pacu bekerja kita yang atur sendiri, kapan mau olah data, kapan ketemu pembimbing, kapan bikin paper, teruuus aja kayak gitu 3-4 tahun ke depan sampai lo bisa menyatakan bahwa proyek penelitian lo 'selesai' dan bisa diwariskan ke dedek dedek lainnya. phd selayaknya udah ga kuliah, tapi jadi asdos. dan biasanya yang udah ngasdos itu anak" tahun kedua, karena udah klop sama supervisor dan udah biasa dengan tool dan metodologi yang diajar di kelas, secara hal itu yang mereka pegang sehari-hari.

si saya yang ambisius ini sebenarnya sudah jaga" agar ga ada kata 'lowong' yang menyebabkan malas ngampus. tapi belakangan gw suka agak bingung ngapain di kantor dan accomplishment apa yang realistis untuk dicapai, dan segala sesuatu rasanya terlalu bertele-tele. nanya ini, dioper ke itu, lalu nunggu. peristiwa 'nunggu' ini lah yang bikin gw suka stres sendiri. mau ngapain dengan waktu tunggu sebanyak iniiiiii selain lagi" baca buku dan paper.

namun, setiap kali gw malas, gw selalu ingat bahwa gw punya end game. end game buat semua ini, dan yang akan jadi awal untuk hal" lainnya. kembali ke pos sebelumnya, berikut kegiatan gw selama 3 bulan terakhir:

1. ngerjain proyek (PhD)
2. bhangra dan audisi timnya
3. pantomime dan end year shownya
4. skills and IT training
5. masak dan hal" rumah tangga lainnya

nah! setiap poin yang gw tulis HARUS punya end game. nomor 1, tentu, end game-nya adalah semuanya selesai. gw lulus dengan gelar, dengan beberapa goal kecil di antaranya. nomor 2, gw sudah ada rencana end game sendiri dan mengapa gw tetap setia, selain karena saya memang cinta  #ahayyy nomor 3 sudah end game. no more panto. yang penting ga mati penasaran lol. nomor 4 karena saya memang pengen banget jago Matlab dan bisa main LaTeX, dengan sedikit bumbu asik Linux,. somehow gw yakin semua ini bakal berguna. dan terakhir si nomor 5, tentu demi rumah tanggaku di masa depan #asikasikjoss

jadi, kalau segala sesuatu punya end game, kita tetap bisa fokus walau pada prosesnya ya, capek dan terseret-seret. ga sedikit teman" gw yang memilih untuk ga masak dan ga beberes rumah/kamar dengan alasan "banyak tugas" dan "ga ada waktu," padahal waktu yang dibutuh kan ga seberapa dibanding dengan hasil akhirnya (i.e. gw jadi bisa masak dan rumah gw rapi, yuhu). entahlah, puasnya beda ngerjain sendiri sama bayar orang untuk ngerjain, hahaha.

tapi kalo boleh jujur, nomor 2 hingga 5 itu adalah cara gw untuk refresh dari kegiatan nomor 1 yang terlihat ga ada ujung. "ga ada waktu" yang mungkin dipake rekan" gw untuk party dan bergaul gw pake untuk masak dan beberes rumah. "ga ada waktu" yang mungkin dipake rekan" lain untuk tidur dan/atau nonton serial gw pake untuk latihan bhangra. waktu selalu ada, tinggal gimana manage-nya aja ;)
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